The pregnancy test is positive, oh wow, how am I gunna tell my Mother?
(my father died 3 years previously) I am pregnant! Just turning 17
I guess at least, I am engaged so that should make it easier on all of us.
Mum can I have a talk to you in private? (away from my 3 brothers big ears)
"Sure.." she said. Gulp. Now where do I start?
With my back to mum I blurted out, "Mum.. I am pregnant."
"I had the test a week ago and I didnt know how to tell you".
Total silence. Then, "How could you let this happen?"
So.. I get the mother and daughter lecture on should and shouldnt have done.
It was decided that the wedding be bought forward.
I was five months pregnant when we got married.
During the pregnancy, I had this awful niggling feeling
That all wasn�t right with the baby.
But my Gynecolagist kept reassuring me that everything was ok.
There was no such thing as as amniotic fluid tests or ultra sounds in 1970.
The week before Gavin was born I was at the Gyno�s office crying and saying
"There is something wrong with this baby".
He didn't believe me though. Because and told me
"It's just nerves with your first baby".
all that week I had nightmares about the baby born with horrific deformaties.
I woke my husband up at 2am in the morning saying
"Hospital time! My waters have broken". that was on the 21st December.
Gavin was eventually born after a battle with forceps on the 23rd Dec 1970.
Hearing the Doctor saying "It's a Boy!" I laid back and relaxed.
All of a sudden there seemed to be deadly silence. Then Ouch.
I felt 1 injection and then another. I dont remember much after that.
"Mrs O�Farrell.. Are you awake?", I kept hearing.
Looking up there was a Doctor and 2 nuns standing above me.
"Mrs O�Farrell.. We have some really sad news to tell you.."
"Your baby has been born with a congenital birth defect", they said.
They said a lot more things but my brain shut down.
I guess I just didntnot want to hear what they were saying.
The most profound thing I kept hearing was from a priest asking me
"To christen the baby before he goes to god", I kept saying no
But eventually I said yes just so I could go back to sleep.
Waking up it was around 7pm that night and I was back in the ward.
Looking at quite a few visitors. They all said their congrats.
Then the nuns came in and asked everyone to leave.
Except for my Mother, her fiance, and my husband.
After all the others left. The nurse came in with this beautiful
red headed baby with thick hair down to the shoulders
and his hair in a ponytail, what was going through my mind
was total confusion. Did I dream about something wrong with my baby?
I must have cos look here he is.
Nursing him was one of the most wonderful experience I have ever had.
The love I felt right then and there I had never felt before.
The nurse and a nun was standing above me.
Asking me if I remember what I was told in the delivery room?
Then it all hit me like a huge rock had been thrown at my head.
It is one of the most frightening feeling I have ever felt.
Here is my beautiful baby brought to me that looked
very healthy and contented, but wrapped up was where is birth defect was.
They told me it was called Spina-Bifida.
and he was paralysed from the waist down.
and not to expect him to live for more than 2 days.
The nuns then turned around and asked my mother and husband.
"Would you please drive this baby to the Childrens hospital?"
Dazed and in Shock I asked "What about an ambulance?"
I then was told no there wasnt any available.
My poor mother was in a state of shock about taking the baby to the hospital.
I guess she didnt have a choice, so they went off with Gavin to the hospital.
Damn! I was so full of emotion and confusion.
It just seemed like a real bad dream.
I couldnt leave the hospital cos I was severely cut.
And had quite a few stitches. I asked to be put in a private room.
But my request was denied due to there were none available.
I hated that hospital with a passion.
Finally on the 25th. Christmas day.
I was able to go to the hospital and see the doctors.
My hubby and I were taken into the intesive care unit.
That was the first time I really saw Gavin.
Full of drains and tubes, I wasnt even allowed to touch or hold him.
Watching him.. He smiled with wind. That was when I bonded with my son.
I knew he was a fighter all the way.
We were led to the Doctors room, to discuss Gavin, and his medical condition.
Mr & Mrs O�farrell the Doctor said,
Your Son has been born with a horrific birth defect called spina-bifida.
He has a severe degree of this congental defect.
He will be mentally affected, will never walk,
Nor have control of his bowel or bladder.
My advice to you is to sign him over as a ward of the state.
And walk out of here and forget him, go home and try for another baby,
But be aware this is a hereditary condition.
I said no. He is our child and I will never sign him over to anyone.
Although my husband wanted us to.